The Cancer Compass

Cycle 1 Day 4.  I am facing a lot of mental challenges this week. Bare with me as I pour out all my thoughts in no order whatsoever. One thing I do want to address is everyone else's feelings. Some have taken it personal with my short responses or my lack of response altogether. PLEASE do not take it personal. I simply am trying to keep my head above water here. I love each and every one of you and I cherish all of your support more than I will ever be able to express. Sometimes I am able to read the messages and then I forget to respond. Sometimes all I have in me is to give a heart emoji back or simply type on here and not respond individually. It doesn't mean I don't care.  On top of making sure I am taking care of myself mentally and physically through my first round, I was rear-ended a few days ago and I have to deal with phone calls with car insurance and getting my car in the shop and getting a rental. I don't say that for anyone to pity me but maybe give you a ...

 Day 1 is done! Everything is well and I am home resting! My kiddos come home soon so I will have to keep this short but I have so much to say! I want to talk about the lady receiving chemo beside me, the nurses, ‘divine intervention’ and all of YOU and your support. I truly do not feel alone. Thank you. 

INFO ON SELF BREAST EXAMS AND DIFFERENT KINDS OF BREAST CANCERS  SELF BREAST EXAM  Here is a link on a more detailed self breast exam. TYPES OF BREAST CANCER  This link lists out different kinds of cancers. I have Inflammatory Breast Cancer if you want to read on that. It came on quick and I will tell you what started as some redness on the bottom side of my chest is now covering the entire thing.  I'll be honest, I have not checked my breasts regularly for changes because for the last 9 years I have consistently been pregnant or breastfeeding. There was very little time that one of those things wasn't happening. SO my breasts were constantly changing. I didn't think much of it as far as cancer goes. I have been so educated now and I am aware breast cancer can even reveal itself DURING pregnancy. SO we really should always be paying attention to our bodies in this way.  Performing a breast self-exam is an important way to be proactive about breast health.  ...

Finally, my treatment is going to begin.    Best case scenario is: I will receive aggressive chemotherapy every two weeks starting Tuesday, October 28. I need to do that for 4 cycles. Then I need to follow that with 12 weeks of a different, less aggressive, kind of chemo. This will be followed by surgery and radiation. Major prayer requests at this time would be my body responds amazingly to the treatment and the cancer shrinks quickly. Making it easier for the surgeons to get everything.  side effects are minimal so I can continue to care for my kids and household and potentially return to work! avoid infection! Infection during chemo is very dangerous. Avoiding infection is hard in general but when I live with the cutest little human petri dishes that go to public school I am a bit worried about that! ha!  Side effects of chemo include heart issues, bladder infections, and neuropathy. These are the biggest concerns for me right now. Good news is I am starting thi...

Cancer Praise Report! I had a PETSCAN done and the results are in! There were concerns of the cancer spreading to my liver and right ovary. However, I am happy to announce the scan showed NO CANCER HAD SPREAD!  PETSCAN measures cancer by a term called SUV. Standardized uptake value. A normal range of SUV is 0.45-2.0 .. Maybe 2.5 depending on the organ. My left breast is the one with the mass in it and that resulted at 20.7 SUV and 20 SUV in a lymph node on that same side. The non cancer breast also showed a response at 3.3 SUV. My oncologist believes this could be because my port was put in a few days prior. I will get a breast MRI to follow and measure. By the way, here is a picture of what the PETSCAN machine was in! How crazy is this?  LINKS TO SUPPORT: SHIRTS   GO FUND ME

If only love could cure cancer!!!   The news is out that I have cancer. The outpouring of love and support I have felt over the last 24 hours alone is unmatched. I am going to try and capsulate that feeling into words.... I am brought to tears every time I look at my phone. Reading all your messages, seeing your donations, the texts asking how you can help, the prayers being written out for me to read, the songs that have gotten you through your struggles... my heart can't grasp it. This kind of love and support is unheard of. But yet here I am witnessing it for myself.  If only love could cure cancer!!!   No, love can't cure cancer. BUT love can remind us we are not alone in our battles and neither are our kids. Love provides me a sense of strength to face the physical and emotional turbulence of this journey. Knowing you are all rooting for me gives me the courage to fight. Love can't cure cancer but it reminds me time and time again I am part of a MASSIVE community. Y...

 "October 3 he asked me what day it was." Its October 3rd.   If you don't know that is a mean girls reference which just happens to be the day I got my port surgery. I had no idea they would be going through my neck for this! I have attached a link for you to see how it is done. My diagnosis requires long term treatment (more on that later) so I opted in to get the port to potentially save my veins.  https://youtu.be/6QFwZAIPBq8?si=XCYlIxOl0w5wvh-a If the link doesn't work go on YouTube and search, "chest port placement." 

  The C word.  For the past few weeks I have been living this outer body experience. To be quite honest, it is a lot to process. I find myself zoning out while people are talking to me. I have moments where I stare off into space and see a highlight reel of my life play before me while I am simultaneously performing my normal multitasking duties in this robotic fashion. So many have asked me how I got here so fast. Let me walk you through it... a lot of this may be shocking and truthfully I'm not sure where to even begin but let's give it a go... You may or may not be aware that I moved out of my home March 3. Out of respect for the last 14 years of my life I won't say much about that. Although it plays a significant part in my story, it is not why I write to you today. I quite literally woke up one morning with a massive lump in my left breast. With my youngest going back and forth to his dad's house I decided it was time to wean him from breastfeeding. I assumed the m...